redforce | inbox ▣ saltburnt

I need you to teach me armament haki.

[the sun is Not Up.]

( the notification pings and shanks hears it, groans softly, ignores it — only rolls over when set leans over his shoulder to tell him the message is from koby. blearily, shanks types out a reply: )

Alright.

( and promptly crashes again. for minutes or hours, he can't be sure, except that the thought of why churns in his head like a whirlpool, keeping him from any real rest. he's been more distant than usual, after everything that happened in the commune. hasn't wanted to push koby toward any particular feeling, only made known that he's here. that he's always here. that his choice doesn't change anything.

when he eventually wakes again, he sends koby a more coherent follow-up message: )

You've retrieved your stone? I can't have you losing yourself on me again.

( again, like the weight of weeks of snow. again, like the sting of a blade across his palm, a promise to keep that humanity safely moored in his harbor. again, like the uptick of his pulse, like the wild grunts of a boy more animal than not. )

[shanks can be forgiven for asking -- despite the length of time elapsed between resurrection and the request, koby's mental state remains largely unclear. any attempts to reach out, unseen, have been met with a very stubborn emotional block, an unspoken don't. of course, shanks could easily bypass such a block, from someone barely a year into their practice, but -- perhaps koby relies on shanks to not pry.

he doesn't rely on anything else. what leaks through, bleeding like ink running in the rain, is equally unsettled: anger and hurt and betrayal and something near-animal. it saturates his emotions, his words, his thoughts, stewing like a festering wound, but koby refuses to let anyone close to it.

set had tried. set had been snarled at and eventually distracted by the nature of the house's change, an echo of years ago, and koby would be lying if he said he wasn't relieved by the distraction. it lets him lock up all that hurt and protect it, again, let the fact of him being a seal again be what sticks. not the anger.

still, it bleeds in:] Yes. I figured it out myself. Nothing for you to bother yourself over.

( sometimes, shanks forgets that koby is still a child in many ways, only barely past the age of twenty, the same age shanks was when he thought he had his anger and grief and loneliness under control because he was a captain and in charge — but it's obvious in the petulance of koby's answer, in the way he locks his emotions up tight like luffy used to when he was trying to prove to shanks how strong and brave he was. that he wasn't just some little kid, that he wasn't hurt or sad or angry or any of those things little kids often are.

thankfully, shanks has the patience of a saint, isn't bothered by the impertinence. it just makes him sigh, knowing there's very little he could say to make things better. koby needs to get this out on his own terms, even if that means taking it out on shanks. )

Good. We'll start next week, then.

inbox ▣ saltburnt

@koby | some godawfully-early morning

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